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JACS LIBRARY - OUR STORIES
A Memorial for a JACS Founder
On June 21, 1996, JACS lost one of our staunchest supporters and I lost one
of my best friends. Dr. Willy Mautner, presiding Chair of the JACS Council, died
of lung cancer at Mount Sinai Hospital in New York City. He is survived by his
wife Norma of Birmingham, AL, daughter Polly of Warwick, NY, sister Nelly Urbach
of Washington, DC, and was predeceased by son Henry. Willy was born in Vienna,
Austria, and graduated from Birmingham-Southern College in 1949 and Harvard
Medical School in 1953. In his long career, he served as Director of Pathology
and Clinical Laboratories and Chief of Medical Services at a variety of New York
City based hospitals and medical centers. He served as adjunct faculty at the
New School for Social Research teaching courses on substance abuse. He was an
important member of several professional and special interest organizations,
including ASAM, the American Society for Addiction Medicine and PFLAG, Parents
and Friends of Lesbians and Gays.
Sunday, June thirtieth, a large contingent of Willyâs family and friends
met to pay tribute to a man we will all sorely miss. The following is an account
of my personal musings about my special friend Willy.
He would not want us to be gathered together to pay tribute to him. An
intensely private person, Willy hated being fussed over or singled out for
recognition. His instructions to me over the last several weeks were to tell
people exactly what was happening, and that they should NOT call him with their
good wishes and concerns. The attention made him very uncomfortable. Even in his
volunteer capacities, he preferred to work behind the scenes, influencing, not
participating. An involved observer.
Describing Willy is an adventure in contradictions. He was unemotional,
rational, matter of fact, keenly intellectual and deeply committed to the causes
he championed and the people he cared about. He kept his life compartmentalized
so that few of us in one area knew much about the others. But he was uniformly
described by all who knew him as caring, devoted, totally nonjudgmental,
contemplative, a nurturer who was always respectful, gracious, generous of
spirit, patient, calm and wise. Deliberate and methodical, decisions sometimes
took him so long to make that some of us labeled him a procrastinator, but all
of us knew him as a great listener. He was always a gentleman, but it was
difficult to detect the Southern drawl under his heavy Austrian accent.
When I met Willy, I had just discovered JACS and he was President of the
JACS Foundation. WillyÎs calm voice brought reason to Board meetings. However,
his need to study every subject in great depth before making a decision, drove
me to distraction. He preferred to table decisions for further study while I, a
first term trustee, demanded instant action. As I became more involved and
became President of JACS, I spent more and more time in discussion,
consultation, and collaboration with Willy and came to value his considered
opinions more than I realized.
Without plan or intent on either side, Willy became my mentor. His wisdom,
level head and intuitive sensitivity made him an ideal sounding board. His
complete objectivity and totally nonjudgmental attitude, made him a trusted
advisor. He never offered one word of criticism. Even if I did something that
was not his way, his response was one of unqualified support. He nurtured me so
that I could take risks that even he doubted. Many others have attested to
similar relationships with Willy.
He never assumed that he was right. He always made room for other peopleâs
opinions, no matter how inexperienced or unlearned they were. Not that he did
not have strong opinions of his own. But always open for discussion; always
willing to listen; always willing to adjust and adapt; he always made it seem
that what others had to say was important. He never sought glory, only the
greatest gain for the greater good.
He apologized to me more than once in those last weeks as he got weaker and
could offer less and less in support. I am glad that he knew how much I depended
on his advice and wisdom, although he also assured me that I would manage fine
without him. During our last social visit in his beloved country retreat in
Warwick, NY, we talked about death. He was very up front about his own mortality
when he found out about the cancer. However, he had few words to waste on the
subject, mostly, as usual, he listened to me.
Willy and other friends and I shared some really amazing adventures. The
JACS mission to Israel in 1994 involved not only rigorous touring, but visits
and presentations at addiction treatment centers and Hebrew Union College. Willy
gamely showed up for all the important events although he was obviously not
feeling well. Within weeks of his return to the US he was in the hospital for
open heart surgery.
Willy was the one who organized a three-day white water rafting escapade in
the Grand Canyon. He definitely did not realize what he was getting us into. In
115 degree air temperatures and 50 degree water temperatures, the outdoor
accommodations were rough by any standards. Probably the oldest member of our
expedition, Willy persevered gamely. When the rafts pulled out at sunrise each
day, Willy was in his place. When we plunged over twenty-five foot rapids with
screams of terror or floated lazily through calm pools, Willy was in his place.
It was uncomfortable for all of us, Willy really suffered and never complained
once (unlike some of us less stoic types!) I am really grateful that he had the
guts to conceive of the trip so that I got to have such a great adventure.
My relationship with Willy was based on a mutual love of the JACS program.
The melding of 12 step recovery and Judaism touched something in both of us that
required a commitment of time, attention and effort that lasts a lifetime. With
Willy's support, all my efforts in JACS seemed less difficult. Continuing
without him is hard, but the JACS spirit is what he was about. That spirit will
endure in part because of the role that he played and his spirit is part of all
of us who carry on.
A special DR. WILLY MAUTNER SCHOLARSHIP FUND has been established by the
JACS Council to honor his memory. All contributions will be used to help bring
first timers to JACS retreats. Checks can be sent to the JACS office and should
be made out to JACS/JBFCS with a notation about this fund.
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